Bits of Being

thoughts on life, faith, family….and, yes, just learning to "be"

For my daughters

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Here you are, each of you, ready to catch the next wave into the excitement of life. And as you ride those waves, my hope is that you learn to swim and surf with great skill and strength, so that eventually you land upright, on solid ground. You used to just dabble in the ocean with your toes and then your feet, afraid to go in any further and being content with the sand. But as your swimming skills grew, so did your curiosity. It didn’t take long for you to start wanting to wade deeper and deeper, up to your knees and then your waist, until you were finally riding the waves with all the thrill and danger that entailed.


The same thing happened with the rest of your life. You used to be content playing on the floor of the living room with your dolls and dishes, but then you wanted to start riding your bike down the street, and then hanging out with your friends, independent of your dad and me. Then, the older two of you got your own jobs and your own drivers’ licenses, graduated from high school and embraced college life. One of you even got married. (And we couldn’t be happier for you and our dear son-in-law!) And now your college graduations are looming close, and none of us know what the next wave might hold. But I am confident that you’ve built up your strength and skill enough to ride it.

Waves can be so unpredictable. Sometimes they are gentle and easy to ride. Those are my favorite…fun and soothing and relaxing. Life can be that way at times. Enjoy those times! But don’t expect them always. Other waves may hit you harder, demanding that you fight the push and the pull in order to stay upright. But, if you catch them at the right time, the thrill can’t be beat. I think you’ve experienced some of those waves as you’ve faced the stress of schoolwork, the pressure of relationships, and demanding jobs. And you’ve also experienced the rewards of that hard work.


Finally, there are those waves that catch us by surprise, knocking us down, scraping us against the sand, causing us those moments of panic where we wonder if we’ll make it back up to the air. These waves are the life-changers, shifting our perspectives and putting us in touch with what’s essential. These are the moments I want you to be prepared for…the times when you wonder why and how and how long…the times when hope ebbs and peace eludes and love evades…the times when all you can see is the disaster and the suffering and the abuse and the bondage. These waves are dark and overwhelming. But they are not the final picture. Look a little closer. Look under the surface. They say there’s a whole other world waiting to be discovered in our oceans. But it’s under the surface, under the storms, under the waves.

Life is scary. We see so much these days in the news and hear from so many about the tragedies that surround us. Life is sad. It isn’t fair. It can be downright heartbreaking. But where are you looking? What are you focusing on? Look at the goodness growing up out of the cracks. Look at the person building bridges even while others are knocking them down. Look at forgiveness changing a landscape of bitterness. Look at resurrection happening where death was intended. And don’t just look, join the work. This is my prayer for you…That you would be part of this work of goodness and kindness growing in our world… That you would help others learn to surf and swim with confidence and look under the surface…That you would be hope.

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