I walk to the shoreline.
Heavy weights propel me forward.
I am sinking.
Yet I feel the rhythm and the reassurance of monotony.
And I lift my eyes to take in Eternity.
(Pause)
I’m here at the edge, in my mess.
It’s tempting to step back to where I can’t get wet,
But the One who is All-Vulnerable draws me deep.
Water covers, but water also reveals.
It brings its secrets to shore one by one,
The tides pulling back to show what’s underneath.
I count the shells along with my griefs,
But I cannot count the grains of sand cradling the shells,
As I cannot count the loving thoughts cradling me as I am kissed by the sun
Until another wave washes them back into the Deep once again,
No longer alone.
(Pause)
Why can I not find what I’m looking for?
This is a sham!
My heart is wrapped in fear as I face the unknown,
And the known.
The Bigness brings me no comfort.
With Job, I rant,
And I am silenced by the Confusion of it all.
All is raw and honest here,
And I am abandoned and bereft,
Yet listening closely, I hear a whisper.
The Wild whisper calls.
No, I cannot follow!
(Pause)
I am stuck in the marsh,
Brooding amidst the ugliness and stench.
Then a Presence sneaks in unawares,
Compelling me to lift my head, then lift my feet.
As I give in to the Presence,
I am moved toward beauty
And I rest silently in it.
In this pause, I begin to hear
The Cadence and the Breath of Love.
(Pause)
Grief is fading as Stillness overcomes.
Troubles like the sun melt into the waters,
Whether they be tempestuous waves or gentle swells.
The loveliness of my surroundings fills me even on the inside,
And my burdens seem lighter,
At least for this moment.
Today, though it may not last, Comfort is mine.
Then I turn and see a lonely figure in the distance,
Standing bowed to the wind
And I breathe Comfort in her direction
That she may sense she is not alone.
(Pause)
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