Bits of Being

thoughts on life, faith, family….and, yes, just learning to "be"

Advent 2020 – Day 12 Disorder

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Today’s word is DISORDER. That might surprise you. Isn’t order good, not disorder? Yet I don’t think Jesus’ birth was orderly. In fact, it was all rather chaotic. It certainly brought disorder to Mary’s life, an unmarried teenage girl who was betrothed to Joseph. This wasn’t what she had planned. It brought disorder to the shepherds’ lives as they were calmly watching their sheep. It brought disorder to the magi’s lives as they made a long journey from another land just to see this baby. It brought disorder to King Herod’s life, as he felt extremely threatened by this baby’s birth. Think about this: disorder brought about epiphany. Disorder brought in a new era. Disorder brought a much-needed change. 

Yet, we try so hard to hang on to order. At least, I do. I want to avoid what is unfamiliar and untested and new. I stay away from conflict. I ignore inconsistencies, not wanting to dwell on something that might bring about a new way of thinking. If possible, I evade suffering. I’m scared of the dark. At least I know what to expect if I stick with my habitual routines. The ordinary is reassuring.  And so, I grip tightly to the status quo, not wanting to let it go, until something finally pushes me over the edge. What I don’t realize is, this disorder, this falling, is what will transform me. This DISORDER is good. 

Jesus says in Luke 9: 23-24, “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.” Take up your cross. Welcome the darkness. Hold the chaos. Let DISORDER do its transforming work in you, in me. 

I’ve been reading the book A Language Of Healing for a Polarized Nation (by Wayne Jacobsen, Arnita Willis Taylor, and Robert L. Prater) with my book discussion group. We just finished a chapter entitled, “Willing To Be Disruptive.” Arnita says, “For most people, it will take some level of disruptive behavior for personal life change.” This reminds me of quote from John Lewis, “Get in good trouble. Necessary trouble.” Sometimes we need to be disruptive in order to grow. 

So, this Advent I want to embrace DISORDER. I want to see the good in trouble. I want to see the positive in “carrying my cross.” I want to let DISORDER help me not to survive, but to thrive.

Galatians 5:4-6 “When you attempt to live by your own religious plans and projects, you are cut off from Christ, you fall out of grace. Meanwhile we expectantly wait for a satisfying relationship with the Spirit. For in Christ, neither our most conscientious religion nor disregard of religion amounts to anything. What matters is something far more interior: faith expressed in love.’

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